Here is what God helped me right and share at the funeral....
Mom’s Tribute
God is good. I can’t tell you what a privilege and a blessing it is to share with you about the most special woman in my life. Today, I would just like to share with you a few reasons why she was so special to me. On Mother’s day of this year, I gave her a gift that I hope conveyed to her just how special she really was. My gift was a list of 100 things she did right as my mom. Since some of those things are just between mom and I, you don’t get to hear all 100, but I would like to share with you some of the things off of that list
1. You taught me how to properly set a table.
2. When I was nervous before my first soccer game in 6th grade, you took me in to the fellowship center and practiced with me.
3. You took me seriously…
4. You tried to get me to not take myself so seriously.
5. You just laughed and told me to live a little when you found out I had been hiding fake fingernails in my dresser drawer.
6. You made a home that my friends liked to come over to.
7. When I came home from school with dirty clothes, you didn’t get mad. You just said “That’s what the washing machine is for”
8. You let me help you with housework when I was little.
9. You MADE me help with housework when I was older. (I’m sorry for the bad attitudes!)
10. You stayed with me the week before Emily was born…despite all my pregnancy craziness.
11. You let me wear your Ralph Lauren Perfume on special occasions.
**It smells very good today**
12. You’re a wonderful Grammy for my daughter.
13. You taught me to take a 20 minute shower instead of 60 minute ones. (By the way…my showers lately average a mere 7 minutes.)
14. You always told me I was beautiful.
15. You taught me what true beauty really is.
16. You are an example of that beauty.
17. You let me stubbornly hold fast to traditions that were so important to me.
18. Speaking of stubborn….you somehow acquired the balance of knowing when to let me be stubborn…and when to be stubborn yourself. I thank you for both.
19. You taught me this “This little Piggy”, “Oh how I love Jesus” , “This Is the Way We Wash Our Hair”, “Kelly, stop hitting yourself!” , “The “Insy Weensy Spider” & how to steal noses. All of which are becoming classics with a certain 2 year old we both know and love.
20. You taught me the importance of waiting for “God’s best”.
21. You bragged about me.
22. You always reacted in a way that made my homemade gifts & cards seem like the grandest treasures.
23. Golden Girls……need I say more?
24. Everything good I know about being a mommy, I’ve learned from you.
25. I don’t ever remember a time when you said “I told you so”.
26. You’ve folded countless baskets of clothes for me.
27. You didn’t get too upset all the times I fell in lakes and rivers after you told me not to get wet.
My mom impacted my life in countless ways that far exceeded my list of 100. However, there were 3 on my list that far surpass the others. 3 things that…because she did, I am who I am today.
1. One night when I was 4 and couldn’t sleep, you told me that Jesus wanted to come into my heart.
My mom helped me fall in love with Jesus at an early age. My mom made sure I had the opportunity early on to accept him. Because of what Christ did on the cross, I stand here today forgiven and free. Because of what Christ did on the cross, my mom is in heaven…and someday, I will see her again. Praise God.
Mom and I shared a common burden for several people who we know still need to accept Jesus. If even one person here accepts Christ today, all of the events of this week will have been worth it. Dad and I know that mom would say the exact same thing.
2 I’ve learned so much about trusting God from you.
My mom instilled in me a deep faith and trust in God. Not only did she teach me this, but she lived out an incredible example of how a person can cling to God and trust in His promises. Throughout my Mom’s illness, I never never never heard her doubt her God.
I stand here today heartbroken and hurting…but because of my Mom’s legacy, I can tell you that I stand here completely trusting in God wisdom, His perfect timing, His mercy & His love. I know there will still be hard days ahead, but I know my God will carry me. And I know, I can trust his promises that Mom is at perfect peace and joy with Him…and that I WILL see her again. In fact, because of her faith and trust in God, we had a conversation Monday night of this week about the assurance that we had that we would all be in heaven someday.
Finally, mom always pointed me to scripture for encouragement.
Any time my mom said that she felt led to give me a scripture, I listened. Every single time, the scripture would hit the nail on the head. It would be the perfect thing for that moment in time. God has used this method of speaking to me through my mom countless times. It never ceased to amaze me
On Tuesday, the day before she died, my mom left me a voicemail on my cell phone. She told me that she felt led to have me read Psalms 91. She was emphatic that I read it before going to bed that night…and I did. I had someone read it to me the moment after I found out she had gone home to Jesus….and I’ve read it several times since. When I opened her Bible to read it at the house, it fell right open to the exact page, because she had book marked it. Almost the whole Psalm is highlighted. And in her beautiful handwriting she has written next to it the words “Be Brave…You have God!”.
I would like to share with you parts of Psalms 91. I would encourage you to read the whole thing later.
“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord “he is my refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I trust. Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers and under his wings you will find refuge. His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
Because he loves me, says the Lord, I will rescue him. I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me, and I will answer him. I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation.”
I love you Mama… Thank you for your life and your legacy. Thank you for your love and for just being you and all that meant. I’ll make sure Emily knows, Mom. I’ll make sure she knows about all that was so important to you. With God’s help, your legacy will carry on through her. Remember Mom…I’ll always be Mama’s Angel.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
A long road
Today is my mom's 4th day in heaven. I miss her terribly. Today we celebrated her home going. Her funeral was a beautiful, worship filled celebration. I'm drained, but I am enjoying some down time with Aaron and Emily. Dad drove Grandma & Grandpa home. We'll all get back together tomorrow...and Monday we will bury her.
God's strength has been miraculous. He is so real. I'm so thankful. I was hurting tonight, almost thought I had a panic attack coming on. Too many thoughts were whirling in my brain. I asked God to give me something to focus on. He simply said...focus on Jesus. While Aaron and Emily were napping, I spent close to 1 1/2 hours pouring through Mom's Bible. Her highlighted passages were so wonderfully appropriate and comforting. I especially spent time looking at passages that promised of Jesus coming again.
God has answered so many specific prayers. 1. I was dreading and fearful of the moment I was going to see my mom for the first time in her casket. I asked people to pray for an extra dose of grace for that moment. God answered. I walked in the room, and said..."She's beautiful". She really was. It was so wonderful to not see her struggling to breathe. I didn't want to touch her skin because I didn't want to feel the coolness. She was warm the last time I touched her. But I touched her dress and patted her shoulder.
2. After I found out she was gone, I knew right away that I wanted to speak at her funeral. I prayed hard that God would give me the appropriate words. The words had to be such that would honor her...yet be a witness as we have many people in our family who still need the Lord. Dad and I really wanted the plan of salvation shared. (The pastor did in his message). I was also praying that God would give me the strength to share what I wrote in the funeral. God answered both prayers. He gave me the words...and he gave me the strength. I had one of my best friends come up on the platform with me. She was my backup plan in case I got too choked up. Thankfully, I was able to read the whole thing...quite calmly.
Aaron has been my rock. He is absolutely amazing. He feels like he hasn't done much, but he has. He's BEEN HERE. He has shed almost just as many tears as I have...He's taken care of Emily. He's run errands. He played and sang at the funeral. He shared in many intimate, difficult conversations with my Dad and I about my mom's final moments. He has been there to lean on...emotionally and physically. He supported my family, and was an example of a true Godly man, husband & father. I'm so thankful to have him as my husband. There really are no words to describe what he means to me...or how much I love him.
Emily has been my angel. Grammy would have been so proud and touched by her. She went up to mom in the casket and said "Awwww.....". When our babysitters arrived (all the way form Indiana), she insisted on bringing up each of them by the hand to show them her Grammy. She told people over and over that Grammy was with Jesus. She's been so good this week...incredibly patient when I haven't been able to give her the attention she normally gets.
I feel like I'm babbling...but, I think it's to be expected.
It's amazing the things you don't normally think of in regards to funerals. Take picking out flowers for example. How can something hurt so much and feel so right all the same time? It truly was painful. Making arrangements with a director...agonizing.... yet funeral directors have a powerful ministry to families. We were blessed to have an EXCELLENT director. So kind, gracious & sensitive.
That's it...I'm done... I'm tired. I'm sure more aimless ramblings will come later. I think this blog is going to get a lot more use. An outlet...
Please keep praying. It's so desperatly needed. We've made it through most of the initial crisis. Now we just have to rediscover what normal is going to look like. That's going to be no small task. Please keep my dad and grandparents in your prayers as well.
God's strength has been miraculous. He is so real. I'm so thankful. I was hurting tonight, almost thought I had a panic attack coming on. Too many thoughts were whirling in my brain. I asked God to give me something to focus on. He simply said...focus on Jesus. While Aaron and Emily were napping, I spent close to 1 1/2 hours pouring through Mom's Bible. Her highlighted passages were so wonderfully appropriate and comforting. I especially spent time looking at passages that promised of Jesus coming again.
God has answered so many specific prayers. 1. I was dreading and fearful of the moment I was going to see my mom for the first time in her casket. I asked people to pray for an extra dose of grace for that moment. God answered. I walked in the room, and said..."She's beautiful". She really was. It was so wonderful to not see her struggling to breathe. I didn't want to touch her skin because I didn't want to feel the coolness. She was warm the last time I touched her. But I touched her dress and patted her shoulder.
2. After I found out she was gone, I knew right away that I wanted to speak at her funeral. I prayed hard that God would give me the appropriate words. The words had to be such that would honor her...yet be a witness as we have many people in our family who still need the Lord. Dad and I really wanted the plan of salvation shared. (The pastor did in his message). I was also praying that God would give me the strength to share what I wrote in the funeral. God answered both prayers. He gave me the words...and he gave me the strength. I had one of my best friends come up on the platform with me. She was my backup plan in case I got too choked up. Thankfully, I was able to read the whole thing...quite calmly.
Aaron has been my rock. He is absolutely amazing. He feels like he hasn't done much, but he has. He's BEEN HERE. He has shed almost just as many tears as I have...He's taken care of Emily. He's run errands. He played and sang at the funeral. He shared in many intimate, difficult conversations with my Dad and I about my mom's final moments. He has been there to lean on...emotionally and physically. He supported my family, and was an example of a true Godly man, husband & father. I'm so thankful to have him as my husband. There really are no words to describe what he means to me...or how much I love him.
Emily has been my angel. Grammy would have been so proud and touched by her. She went up to mom in the casket and said "Awwww.....". When our babysitters arrived (all the way form Indiana), she insisted on bringing up each of them by the hand to show them her Grammy. She told people over and over that Grammy was with Jesus. She's been so good this week...incredibly patient when I haven't been able to give her the attention she normally gets.
I feel like I'm babbling...but, I think it's to be expected.
It's amazing the things you don't normally think of in regards to funerals. Take picking out flowers for example. How can something hurt so much and feel so right all the same time? It truly was painful. Making arrangements with a director...agonizing.... yet funeral directors have a powerful ministry to families. We were blessed to have an EXCELLENT director. So kind, gracious & sensitive.
That's it...I'm done... I'm tired. I'm sure more aimless ramblings will come later. I think this blog is going to get a lot more use. An outlet...
Please keep praying. It's so desperatly needed. We've made it through most of the initial crisis. Now we just have to rediscover what normal is going to look like. That's going to be no small task. Please keep my dad and grandparents in your prayers as well.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Psalms 91
Yesterday at around 9am my mother died. Suddenly...unexpectedly.
I will write more later in days ahead. For now, I'm just trying to breathe. My heart is broken. The grief is like nothing I've never experienced. However, I don't grieve as someone without hope. Heaven is a delightful promise. God is faithful and good. I'm trusting in Him...and believing his grace is sufficent.
But sometimes, it's all I can do to breathe. My heart hurts so much.
The day before she died, my mom called and said she wanted me to read Psalms 91. She said she felt led to give it to me.
Little did I know...
The arrangements are as follows:
Victoria Bennett
Visitation:
Friday 6-8pm
The Sytsema Chapel
737 Apple Ave
Muskegon, MI 49442
Funeral:
Saturday 1:00pm
First Wesleyan Church
1040 E. Forest Ave
Muskegon, MI 49441
I will write more later in days ahead. For now, I'm just trying to breathe. My heart is broken. The grief is like nothing I've never experienced. However, I don't grieve as someone without hope. Heaven is a delightful promise. God is faithful and good. I'm trusting in Him...and believing his grace is sufficent.
But sometimes, it's all I can do to breathe. My heart hurts so much.
The day before she died, my mom called and said she wanted me to read Psalms 91. She said she felt led to give it to me.
Little did I know...
The arrangements are as follows:
Victoria Bennett
Visitation:
Friday 6-8pm
The Sytsema Chapel
737 Apple Ave
Muskegon, MI 49442
Funeral:
Saturday 1:00pm
First Wesleyan Church
1040 E. Forest Ave
Muskegon, MI 49441
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